The Queen’s Quill

These words come as they are—wandering, wondering, and weaving themselves into meaning.

 May one of these reflections speak to you at the exact moment you need it. 

Instead of creating what I want to see and experience I keep allowing the limiting beliefs to hold me hostage. Why am I not leaning into those moments whenever possible?

Why am I not doing the things that bring me joy consistently?

Why deny myself in that manner? 

Literally settling for the doom and gloom rhetoric…

Letting the “rules” keep me in place. 

Rules created by others and myself.

Often times my rules were way harsher than others.

Staying power. 

We often celebrate staying in a place.

Whether that place is jobs, relationships, other…

Longevity. 

There are times that staying isn’t anything to celebrate because it’s hurting you.

 As soon as we that 5th red flag, go ahead and get up out of that situation. 

I said 5 because you may be like me and just ignore the flags like we’re at Six Flags over Georgia…

I’ve stayed in places too long. 

Why?

I worried about how it will look or sound 

Feeling like leaving early meant I gave up too quick 

Thinking it’s a failure…

Obsessed with quantity over quality. 

What if you stayed 14 years but you suffered, lost yourself, got ill, stalled yourself, didn’t enjoy yourself? 

Do we still celebrate the longevity? 

Just so many rules that my creativity is imprisoned. 

Scared to live, to make mistakes…

Yet knowing the gift and talent is there….

In my last threapy session we talked about me remembering to bring my trophy with me. I won! I am winning even when it looks and feel like I’m losing! 

Allowing myself to dream without a budget because on faith I know my God can do anything but fail me. 

I deserve to live a life of joy. You do too. 

Just some random and unscripted thoughts on a Saturday…

✨ Running Thoughts ✨

These are just the unfiltered places my mind wanders. No outline, no agenda—just me capturing the thoughts/reflections as they come.

• We should do one thing that’s scary each day. Ok, that’s a stretch I’m good with one thing a month…it can result in at least 12 new things 
• Connections are key
• Count it all joy; where God guides He provides (Isaiah 58:11)
• Part of leadership is getting people to buy into the vision you have
• Don’t let the environment/setting influence how you show up and the efforts you put forward. Whether positioned in a large corner office, a repurposed closet or cubicle. Focus on the fact that you’re in the building. Settings are temporary. Authenticity should not be.
  • A title is just a title. Don’t allow that title to limit your contributions. 
  • I’ve been in the nice office with a fancy title. I was miserable. Those walls were silent observers of the tears and frustration. After feeling as if I’ve been abused by the pursuit of leadership roles I said I was done with leadership roles. A friend said, “no; once a leader, always a leader. No matter your title, people will see your innate skills. 
• Sisterhood is a powerful thing. 
• “Get out and smell the roses”-Ms. Evelyn
• “You could be sitting on generational wealth but you won’t jump off the porch”-My sister Alecia
• How can I be afraid to tell man no for fear of his response, but I boldly tell God “no” or “get someone else”. 
• What if being vulnerable is what’s needed in this moment in order to go higher.
• Make the outfit work. You cute! You handsome! 
• We are always waiting. Do it now. We always say “oh when xyz is in place…I’ll do it.” But what about the abcdef…..other variables that we don’t even know to account for…
• You filter matters….what filter are you using to cover yourself and this situation?
• We are living for others and not living for ourselves.
• We are living based on a narrative someone else created who doesn’t know your true self

These are just the unfiltered places my mind wanders. No outline, no agenda—just me capturing the thoughts as they come.

Often a man and a woman rush from moment to moment

Attempting to soak up every second together 

Rushing as if the sand will run out and they must make the most of this time 

Shallow things can not withstand storms. They will be shaken and blown away

But what happens when man and woman stop rushing and stop focusing on “time” 

What God brings together in His time no one can unhinge…

What’s rooted with God as the center can stand strong against the storms that will come. 

November 2023 Thoughts

This question has come up in some way for the past couple of months.

”Jump off the porch”…..”Just do it”. 

These have been the responses and encouragement from friends. This morning in conversation the question “what are you waiting for” came up. Laughingly my boss told me to make sure I post this one. 

How many of you have asked God for a sign? “God send me a sign if this is what you want me to do”. 5 signs later and we’re still like “God send me a sign”. Even after all the signs we still go to everyone else for their confirmation, encouragement and validation. 

I often say I have delayed obedience. How long can we delay obedience? Why is it that when a random person asks us to do something we instantly agree. We rarely ask any questions. It’s immediate obedience. Yet, when it comes to God we get to bargaining and telling Him under what circumstances we will be obedient. 

There is no reason I should be dragging my feet. I should have moved the first time He gave me the assignment. 

What’s the thing you know that you know you should be doing? What are you waiting for? We live life with a lot of audacity. We have the audacity to tell God when and how we will do things. 

My prayer today is that we will be obedient. That we have a “we get to” attitude when it comes to being obedient to God. We’ve been cleared for take off and we’re just sitting on the run way. Help remove the fear that is preventing you from taking action. 

-March 2024

In the quest for personal and spiritual growth, there’s a common misconception that we must reach a state of perfection before we are worthy of divine interaction. Society has prescribed what and how our interactions with God should look like. The perfection belief can create a sense of inadequacy and deter us from seeking a higher connection. However, the truth is much more reassuring and compassionate: Don’t wait until you’re perfect—God wants to interact with you just where you are now. If you were perfect, would you need God? 

The Myth of Perfection

Perfection is a myth; a horizon that keeps moving farther away as we approach it. Striving for excellence is admirable, but when it transforms into an obsession with perfection, it becomes a barrier to progress. The belief that you must be flawless to deserve God’s attention is not only untrue; it runs contrary to the fundamental principles of many faiths.

 God’s Invitation for Interaction

The essence of most spiritual paths is the notion that the divine seeks a relationship with us, as we are. God doesn’t require us to reach an impossible standard. Instead, there’s a gentle encouragement: Just keep trying. It’s in our attempts, our struggles, and even our failures that we find the most profound opportunities for growth and connection.

 The Mutual Search

A beautiful aspect of spirituality is the reciprocal seeking between humans and the divine. He’s seeking you just as you’re seeking Him. There is a sacred dance of sorts, where every step you take toward the divine is met with an encompassing embrace. This dynamic connection ensures that no matter where we are on our journey, we are not alone.

Grace and Mercy: The Gifts of Imperfection

Recognizing our imperfections doesn’t lead us to despair; rather, it brings us to an understanding of God’s generous nature. He gives us grace and mercy—two powerful gifts that allow us to face our human limitations without fear. Grace is the unwarranted favor that blesses us despite our flaws, and mercy is the compassion shown to us even when we falter.

In the tapestry of life, our imperfections are not stains to be removed but rather threads that add depth and texture to the whole. Grace and mercy reassure us that our imperfections are accounted for, and still, we are loved and valued.

Moving Forward with Confidence

If you find yourself postponing spiritual communion because you’re “not ready” or “not good enough,” remember that it is not perfection that qualifies us for divine interaction—it’s our very human nature. The emphasis should not be on a faultless existence but on a heartfelt effort to grow, learn, and connect. In that effort, you will find not only the essence of your spirituality but also the embrace of the divine.

Inviting You As You Are

As you move through life with its inherent chaos and challenges, know that you are being called to a unique and enduring relationship with God—one that is inclusive, nurturing, and accepting. You don’t have to be perfect; you just have to be you. Through every hardship and every joy, God is there, extending grace, mercy, and an invitation to a deeper connection. Just keep trying, and trust that your efforts are both seen and cherished.

Hey friends!

It might be the adult beverage or just the feeling that something different needed to happen tonight.

Auntie is outside…literally LOL

I finally decided I would use the fire pit I purchased last fall. At my last house I had a fire pit as well. Never used it. I can distinctly remember selling it during my garage sale. I also distinctly remember getting ready to purchase my current home and being like dang…I wish I would have kept some of that stuff! One of my good sisters has already said we will NOT have another garage sale like that LOL 

Can we have a moment of honesty? Things have been hard. I won’t dive into my own stuff right now…but I know I’m not the only one. I know many of my friends are feeling exhausted..weary…confused…anxious…angry…and so many other heavy emotions. I don’t mean to speak for you…but I confidently say a majority of us are craving some sense of normalcy. 

Do we even know what is “normal” at this point…

Tonight as I sit on my back porch listening to violin covers of some of my favorite R&B jamz, star gazing and simply breathing in fresh air…I chose to sit in this moment and simply be.

As I looked around I thought about how each home contains an individual or family that is dealing that holds their unique story. 

They too may be weathering their own personal storm right now. If they’re like me they’re thankful it’s finally the weekend after another long week. They may have a similar simple prayer: please don’t go by too far. 

Are you up for a quick challenge? 

I will just assume you said yes. 

Find space (no specific time limit) to simply be this weekend.

Sit in the moment.

Be still. 

Enjoy the silence.

Don’t rush. 

Be observant.

Check in with you.

More importantly check in with Him. 

Darkness is often equated with scariness, the unknown and many other negative connotations.  

I challenge you to find the light in the darkness.

Even on a September night in the country South there are twinkles of light in the vast dark sky. 

In the midst of my own storm, it seems so dark…

But I KNOW there is light.

I just have to choose to find it.  

I pray you choose to find it as well.

May the next 48 hours be exactly what you need them to be. 

Sincerely,

Queen Quill

Disclaimer: This post may contain minor grammatical or typographical errors. The focus is on sharing ideas and insights rather than perfection in writing.

Friendly reminder: If something I shared resonates with you, share it with at least one other person…make a connection 💛

The mosaic of human existence is replete with tales of individuals whose lives were prematurely defined by the perceptions and forecasts of others. To surrender your pen is to relinquish the most sacred power you possess—the power to define your own destiny. Life is a personal quest for meaning, and it’s crucial to remember that “every vision isn’t of God.” Not all that glitters aligns with the divine purpose that is meant for you.

In the cacophonous symphony that is life, many voices clamor to etch their narrative onto the blank canvas of our existence. They come bearing the weight of expectations, the ink of tradition, and the brushstrokes of conventional wisdom. However, amid the tumultuous sea of opinions and guidance, it’s essential to remember one fundamental truth: you are the sole author of your story. Let no one script your life’s journey before your own pen touches the paper.

Visions, dreams, and ambitions can often be reflections of the world around us—shaped by culture, influenced by peers, and fashioned by societal standards. The whisperings of divine inspiration are sometimes lost in the clamor of human ambition. It is not every call that must be answered, not every door that must be walked through, and not every path that must be traveled. To decipher which vision bears the mark of a higher calling requires introspection, patience, and the courage to question what appears as a divine sign.

To write your story with authenticity, it’s imperative to plunge into the depths of self-discovery. Through self-reflection and meditation, one can sift through the myriad of voices and sights to uncover the kernel of truth that resonates with one’s own spirit. In this quest, guidance can be sought through prayer, contemplation, and seeking counsel from those who walk in wisdom. It’s a process that demands vigilance and the willingness to step away from the noise to listen to the quiet stirrings of the soul.

Life is not a static script but a dynamic and evolving tale. As you journey through the chapters, you will encounter plot twists and confront antagonists. There will be moments of triumph and pages of heartache. But through each line, remember that the ability to adapt and rewrite is always in your hands. Your story, inherently unique and divinely appointed, is not a reiteration of another’s narrative. It is a testament to your singular journey and the purpose you uncover amidst life’s endless possibilities.

In embracing the pen with which you write your life’s story, there’s a liberating realization: the future is not etched in stone but composed of the choices you make and the faith that guides you. As you embark on this narrative endeavor, let your tale be one of courage, a story that reflects not the will of the world, but the unmistakable voice of your own calling. 

In the unfolding of your personal story, may you find the wisdom to discern the whispers of the divine, while boldly declaring, with every stroke of your life’s quill, that you are, and forever will be, the true narrator of your destiny.

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the sheer unpredictability of life? In a world that often prizes control and organization, the truth is that life is inherently not orderly. We make plans, set goals, and draw timelines, yet unexpected events can sweep in and scatter our carefully laid patterns like leaves in the wind. This realization can be daunting, leading many of us to experience anxiety, especially when we look at our current circumstances and mistakenly view them as permanent fixtures.

Anxiety has a way of distorting our perception, making us believe that the troubles we face today will stretch endlessly into the future. It whispers to us in moments of difficulty, insisting that the disruption and chaos we’re experiencing are here to stay. However, this mindset overlooks the dynamic nature of existence – the constant ebb and flow that characterizes our lives.

Life is not a neat narrative with a clear beginning, middle, and end; it’s more akin to a series of overlapping stories, each with its own twists and turns. We may start our day with a checklist, but by sunset, we’ve encountered a dozen variations that were never part of the initial plan. This isn’t a flaw in the design; it’s the very essence of living. When we understand that disorder is not an anomaly but a fundamental part of the human experience, we can begin to view it with less apprehension and more acceptance.

Embracing the chaotic nature of life doesn’t mean we must succumb to a sense of helplessness; it means recognizing that our control is limited and often shaped by forces beyond our reach. It’s about finding peace in the fact that while we can’t predict every twist and turn, we can adapt and grow with each new challenge.

Moreover, if we shift our perspective slightly, we may see that within chaos lies opportunity. The unexpected events that throw our plans into disarray often bring with them the seeds of new possibilities. They push us out of our comfort zones and compel us to innovate, learn new skills, and forge paths we may never have considered otherwise.

In times of anxiety, it’s essential to remember that change is the only constant in life. The circumstances that feel so confining today are likely to morph into something else tomorrow. Just as the seasons cycle through growth, bloom, decay, and rebirth, our lives too undergo similar transformations. Each phase, no matter how disordered it seems, contributes to our personal evolution.

We can learn to ride the waves of this chaos, much like a surfer who knows that the water beneath them is fickle and unstable but uses their skills to glide upon it nonetheless. By focusing less on creating an orderly life and more on developing resilience and flexibility, we arm ourselves with the tools to navigate life’s unpredictable waters.

So let us take comfort in the beautiful mess that is life, knowing that in the midst of disorder, we are evolving, growing, and learning. The anxiety we feel when looking at our current circumstances as though they are forever only needs a gentle reminder: this too shall pass. And what’s coming next? Well, that’s the adventure.

What inspired me to go on a safari in Tanzania?

On a quiet Sunday afternoon in late October, I was stretched out across my bed when my phone buzzed with a message from my friend Amber. She dropped a simple but life-changing question in our group chat with Carol: “Do y’all want to go on a safari in Africa in April?”

Without hesitation, I replied, “Count me in. I don’t know how I’m paying for it, but I want to go.”
Important side note: I didn’t even ask where in Africa we were going. All I knew were the dates and the cost—and that was enough for me.

When others who eventually joined the trip asked what convinced me, I told them the truth: I didn’t attend the original meeting with our guide, Safari Kay. There was no pitch, no PowerPoint, no persuasive strategy. Just a text. That was all I needed.

My decision was rooted in a few things:

• I had traveled with Amber before and trusted her travel style completely.
• She mentioned her friend John from Arizona would also be joining— a chance to meet a decades old friend she initially met in college.
• And most importantly, Africa had been on my vision board.
  

My desire to travel to Africa planted itself two years prior. I remember sitting at a dinner event hosted by an organization my job supported. The founders shared moving stories of their mission work in Africa. As they spoke, a whisper in my spirit said, “What if you went to Africa?”
Later that night, I told my mom. She shut the idea down quickly—“Only if you’re going with someone you know.”
Back then, I couldn’t think of anyone. Fast forward two years: the opportunity literally messaged me. And I said yes.

How I planned for the trip

Thankfully, Safari Kay handled everything. From the flights to accommodations, all I had to do was make my payments on time. Closer to our departure, she sent over forms and helpful information, and hosted a final pre-departure meeting to answer questions and go over logistics.

We were a group of 12 travelers, plus Kay. Most of the group lived in California. John and I were the only two flying in from other states—he from Arizona, me from Mississippi. I arrived in Los Angeles a day before the big flight.

Amber, John and I also began checking in with each other more often as departure neared—sharing links to travel items, packing tips and making sure we submitted requested information in a timely manner.

One of the most common questions I received was, “How many shots did you have to get?”
Answer: None. I visited my primary care doctor and got a prescription for malaria medication—easy.

Packing came with its own drama. We were given packing parameters due to safari vehicle space. I thought I packed light—until I got to Amber’s and saw her tiny, pink, perfectly packed bag. I was stunned. I asked her, “Sis… who in your family is military?” The way she compacted her wardrobe into that miniature suitcase was an art form.

Travel itinerary & first impressions

Our group flew from Los Angeles, had a brief layover in Amsterdam, and then continued on to Kilimanjaro International Airport in Tanzania. When I say brief…I mean we were running through the airport to get to our connecting flight. 

Amber, John, and I managed to sit together on the first leg of the trip. I won’t name names, but a small mishap prevented us from sitting together on the second flight. I found myself seated near a large family traveling for vacation. I was grateful for my noise-canceling playlist and a bottle of DreamWater.

Although I’ll pull the full itinerary from my email for future posts, I can say the total flight time was LONG—but the excitement helped.

The feeling as it all began

At first, the trip felt far off, like something happening to someone else. I created a Safari countdown timer on my phone. I didn’t tell many people until the new year had begun. My friends, who know I’m always up for a trip, started getting suspicious when I claimed I had “no travel plans.”

But as I boarded that first flight to Los Angeles, it hit me: “I’m really doing this. I’m flying to meet my friends, and we’re going to Africa.”

It wasn’t just a trip. It was a shift.

Pre-departure challenges

Nothing too wild, but I did get stuck in Nashville longer than I planned on my way to Los Angeles. Still, everything worked itself out—like it always seems to when you’re walking in alignment with your purpose.

Coming Up Next:
📍 A full breakdown of our safari adventure
💬 Stories from the people I met along the way

Let me know in the comments if you’ve ever had a “say yes now, figure it out later” moment—it might just lead you somewhere unforgettable. If you have questions drop those in the comments as well! 

— Queen’s Quill 🖋